Solo But SO Major.

 From my heart...   (8/4)

They say “alpha girls” don’t wait for an invite — they make one. But what happens when you’re the only one ready to RSVP? In Cancun, I found out.

The last three days, I’ve been begging to go to the club. I’m 18, so yes, I’m allowed. But nobody wanted to go with me (NOT EVEN JUST TO CHECK IT OUT!)

Last night, I finally got tired of waiting for someone to say yes. So, I decided to be independent. I followed the music, walked into the club on my own, ordered a couple of VIRGIN drinks (calm down), and made new friends (Andrea and Camilo). I instantly felt good vibes and fun energy with people I felt safe with. We danced, laughed, and had a blast. Andrea even walked me back to my room at 12:40 AM to make sure I got there safely.

It felt amazing. I don’t have clubs back home, so this was my chance. I went out on my own, made smart choices, and had the time of my life. That’s what independence should look like.

Then… dinner happened. I was sitting next to my cousin, having fun with the whole family, when my grandma turned to me and asked what time I went to bed. My stomach dropped — I knew something was up. I said “pretty late,” and she started telling me how upset she was that I went out without permission.

Cue my mood crashing.

Here’s the thing: I know I’m still young. I’m not claiming to be the most mature adult in the world. But I’m tired of feeling like it’s a crime to be independent. I take a lot of pride in making smart decisions. If I had felt unsafe at any point, I would have left. Instead, I made friends instead of being alone — that’s called being resourceful, responsible, smart, and yes, independent.

It’s frustrating when the same people who don’t want to join me in my life also don’t want me doing things without them. And yeah, it stung to know somebody told them I went out (especially when they're out here making way riskier choices than I ever would).

So I hid out in the bathroom after dinner, calming myself down, replaying the night in my head. I’m still proud of myself for going. Even if my family didn’t like it, I know I made the right call for ME.

Maybe this is what growing up feels like — the thrill of independence, and the sting of realizing not everyone’s ready to see you as your own person. But you know what? I am. 

That night taught me that independence isn’t just about going out alone — it’s about trusting yourself when no one else does. I learned that I can step into a new place, make connections, keep myself safe, and create memories that are mine alone. Even if my family doesn’t approve, that doesn’t erase the fact that I handled myself exactly how I’d want to — smart, confident, and unapologetically me.

Cancun didn’t just give me a fun night out. It gave me proof that I’m ready to start living life on my own terms.

QOTD: Don't dim your own light just to make someone else comfortable.

Talk soon,

Elle B. Are. ♥

LBRdiaries@blogspot.com